she sat under a blanket like a crocus under an april snowfall

While using the awesome-search-function of gmail, I came across these in an email. This is from teaching 8th grade 3 years ago. Brilliant.

Bad Similes

• Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two other sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master.
• His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.
• She caught your eye like one of those pointy hook latches that used to dangle from screen doors and would fly up whenever you banged the door open again.
• The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.
• McMurphy fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.
• Her hair glistened in the rain like nose hair after a sneeze.
• Her eyes were like two brown circles with big black dots in the center.
• Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.
• He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree.
• The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.
• Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.
• The politician was gone but unnoticed, like the period after the Dr. on a Dr. Pepper can.
• They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan's teeth.
• John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.
• The thunder was ominous sounding, much like the sound of a thin sheet of metal being shaken backstage during the storm scene in a play.
• The red brick wall was the color of a brick-red Crayola crayon.
• Even in his last years, Grandpappy had a mind like a steel trap, only one that had been left out so long it had rusted shut.
• The door had been forced, as forced as the dialogue during the interview portion of "Jeopardy!"
• Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.
• The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.
• He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck either, but a real duck that was actually lame. Maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.
• Her artistic sense was exquisitely refined, like someone who can tell butter from "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter."
• She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.
• It came down the stairs looking very much like something no one had ever seen before.
• The knife was as sharp as the tone used by Rep. Sheila Jackson Lee (D-Tex.) in her first several points of parliamentary procedure made to Rep. Henry Hyde (R-Ill.) in the House Judiciary Committee hearings on the impeachment of President William Jefferson Clinton.
• The ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.
• The dandelion swayed in the gentle breeze like an oscillating electric fan set on medium.
• It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with power tools.
• He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.
• Her eyes were like limpid pools, only they had forgotten to put in any pH cleanser.
• She grew on him like she was a colony of E. coli and he was room-temperature Canadian beef.
• She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs.
• Her voice had that tense, grating quality, like a first-generation thermal paper fax machine that needed a band tightened.
• It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to the wall.
• Every minute without you feels like 60 seconds.

Several times during the day, Julie goes into me-time, and just sits quietly intently reading books.  Sometimes she entertains herself like this quietly, and sometimes she 'reads' aloud (I've got a video!).  Sometimes she does this for over 30 minutes.  Sometimes she sits on the potty (with or without her pants on) and every once in a while, she gets herself into a tent while reading.  Her love of tents is close to my heart.



This from just 10 minutes ago.

One of those days

This morning we whizzed through the sixth grade math lesson, and we ended with 10 minutes for them to do their homework.  They had all finished at 11:10 when it was time for class to be over.... We waited 15 minutes for the next teacher to come, at which point I realized that math class was supposed to end at 11:25, and the next teacher wasn't, in fact, late. 

In my justification, this is our second day of a new schedule with the spring semester. 


Then I proceeded to plan for 7th grade math using the 6th grade textbook.  I read the lesson, wrote out the objectives, my plan, and picked homework problems.  Math class starts and I begin teaching...until one student says to me, "We don't know where you are." 

In my justification, the 6th and 7th grade math texts look exactly alike, except for a color difference, and we know Kate has trouble remembering by color.  In addition, both grades are doing lesson 6-9 next, AND lesson 6-9 in BOTH texts is titled "solving problems with equations"!


I think my brain is foggy with a bit of a cold.  I'm anxiously waiting what will happen in 8th grade math. 

words-ing this Saturday morning.

Chortle is a fabulous word.

Lewis Carroll created it when he combined the words chuckle and snort. He is a genious. He called his creation a portmonteau, which is a French word for a briefcase with two compartments.

I began reading the introduction of a book I had bought last summer: The Right Word, by Jan Venolia. It's been sitting on my bookshelves here in Prague, and I finally dived into it. I recommend it. I think Carol would like it, and I think Courtney would too. I think it would make an excellent addition to any classroom library. The meat of the book is a dictionary of oft-confused words, misused words, and incorrect words. I'm thinking of creating a spelling curriculum out of it for my 7th and 8th graders. From this book, we can explore:

• origins of words
• evolution of meanings
• homophones
• mixed up words
• meanings of words
• words for informal writing v. words for formal, academic writing
• word play

I think it could be a lot of fun. I was toying with the idea of getting Rebecca Sitton for our school, but I think I won't. She has a lot of great theory, but it's a bit too cutesy for middle schoolers, and it does not tailor itself well enough to students with varying spelling abilities, which of course we have in our international classrooms with many ELL students.

In browsing through through the dictionary, I found her entry on paradigm, which only yesterday I was explaining to my eighth graders. She defines it as "an exhaustive model, example, or pattern." Then she goes on to quote Peter Bowler:

"Never use this word yourself, but be prepared, when it is used by another, to lean forward intently, narrow your eyes and say, 'Just a moment--do you really mean paradigm in that context?' When somewhat bemused, he avers that he does, you merely raise your eyebrows and remain silent. With any luck at all, he will now have forgotten what he was going to say. Apply the same technique when confronted with parameter, infrastructure, structure, and matrix."

This is the sort of advice I believe must be in the training for college professors.

reading

I'm reading two books for the first time right now, for my seventh and eighth grade English classes, and enjoying them thoroughly. They're classics, but in case you never read them either, add them to your summer reading list. Around the World in Eighty Days is a blast. I can't believe I've never read Verne before. The characters are funny, and the plot suspenseful. (O-kay, I read the last few chapters [which is NOT a typical habit] so I'd know what to expect and could properly steer class discussion while we're reading it...but it's still been exciting seeing how it all pans out.)

If you don't know, Phileas Fogg is an methodical, home-loving Englishman from 1872 who takes on a home-loving butler Passepartout, only to tell him he's just taken a bet that he can get around the world in eighty days. The world having just been made that much smaller by the steamboat and train, he sets out to prove this to his whist-playing friends of his Club. So you follow him as he goes -primarily by boat and train- eastward around the world, being chased by a detective, and thoroughly convinced he'll have no trouble winning his two-thousand-pound bet.

It'll be a great cap-off-the-year read with the seventh graders who've been studying geography all year, to plot his journey round the earth.

The Bronze Bow is one of those books I recall my mother telling me several times to read, but I wasn't drawn in by the cover or time period, and I guess a bit stubborn on taking reading suggestions (which I realize is stupid, but I was 13). I've not gotten very far yet, but it's quite engaging.

The setting is Judea during the time of the Romans. The main character Daniel is a zealot, who's living in exile from his home town, hoping he's part of a growing army to throw off the Romans. He knows Simon the Zealot who begins to follow Jesus and tries to show Daniel Him.

We're starting our unit on the Romans in eighth grade next week...

I'm pedalling back and forth between them - getting sucked into one, and then realizing I need to keep up with my English class in the other. So far I've gotten Phileas Fogg into India, but it's really time to turn back to Daniel in Capernaum.

have you ever seen this?

Tomorrow we are going to study Dada: an anti-art movement that rose out of World War I; artists that wanted to challenge the accepted, blur the boundaries between art and life, and provoke conventionalists.

What's fascinating to to me about Dada is the name. Its precise origins are unknown, but I think the ambiguity is intentional. Dada is a word that means 'yeah yeah' in Romanian. In French it means hobby-horse. It's a word found in several different languages, and the meaningless of the "movement's" title is the point. Of course being called a movement is counter to the whole idea of Dada. But for lack of a better word, we call it a movement, and it's called Dadaism.

We're going to look at the work of Marcel Duchamp mostly. He did the above. He's famous for taking objects already created and "perfecting" them. He would alter them somehow and declare them his artwork. Hence he made ambiguous what could be called art. He termed them Readymades. (I'm particularly good at this type of art. Yes, yes, hold your applause.)

His most startling work - well, depending on who you are: Mona Lisa defaced is pretty startling - is when he took a urinal and signed it. Titled: Fountain.

(!)

I had a good week. I can hardly believe I'm writing that, but it's Friday evening, and it was a good week.

October was so hard, so busy and difficult, that I felt despairing of this year. But things took a turn in November (at least I do hope it's a trend) and I believe I'm doing better.

This week I enjoyed my students, and I enjoyed teaching. I FINISHED giving standardized testing. We started the Civil War, and I have this unit pretty well laid out, so I'm not stressed. I introduced our next big project: a paper on the Civil War and the kids are excited about it. (!) And we're reading Huck Finn, and I love Huck.

I'm feeling more on my game now, and I must say that I'm pretty sure a primary reason for this is that I have found the source of my allergies. And eliminated them. (well, they're not all gone, but at least I can do away with the major problem now) I had really bad allergies most of October, and I'm sure some of it was fall pollen or whatever plagues us. But as it got colder (and I got out my sleeping bag rather than a blanket) I began to have more problems. Pretty soon I woke up with a swollen eye each morning, and I was pretty miserable.

The situation didn't clear until I left Atlanta...and actually spent three nights away from home. Then I was determined the problem was in my room.

So I spent a night on the couch with my sleeping bag. Problem not solved.

So Courtney said do you think you're allergic to down. Oh no, of course not. I've had a down pillow for nearly my whole life.


So, then I proceeded with my life until suddenly I remembered something. And it all came together. (ok, this is kind of embarrassing, so don't laugh at me. i really am a good scientist and had good reason to be convinced my allergies were confined to dust)

i have, as i said, used this particular floofy pillow for a long time. it's been a favorite. then (right about the time i developed a cat allergy probably) i began to be allergic to this pillow. i'm allergic to dust pretty bad, so when i was having bad allergies, i had cleaned everything else in my room and managed to narrow the problem down to my pillow. (see i am good with the scientific method) i was busy learning about my nasty dust allergy, and i learned that dust mites (which are very icky little bugs, especially blown up at 100x their size in a photograph) can be killed if frozen. so, i proceeded to periodically freeze my pillow. mother would open the freezer in the basement, and come up asking: so, um, what is that big white thing in in the freezer? ah yes. one night around christmas time i put it outside all night in the freezing wind. that did it i thought. then mother gave me for christmas a special allergen-free pillow cover. brilliant. no more dust gets in and the dead dust mites in there can just forget about it. it was like a charm: i and the pillow were happy again. ok, so obviously you can tell where this is going. that lovely pillow was down, and it wasn't really so full of dust mites. it just took me a really long time to figure it out.

i'm allergic to geese.

*sigh*

Georgia again

Back in Georgia for the week, I went to a conference held by the GA Comm. on the Holocaust and it was fabulous. I learned so much, and thought a lot, and feel way more prepared to teach about it. In addition, I got so many resources: books, movies, plus curriculum/lesson plans. And I learned more web addresses that will be helpful. wow

I don't really feel prepared to re-jest all I've learned yet, but the conference highlighted who was responsible and culpable. I learned lots of history, but I feel like even more I have good ideas for discussion and new strategies for getting students to engage in these discussions (and for that matter, any other discussion all year). I feel challenged to do a better job teaching the Holocaust and to get students to be better thinkers. That's always been a priority in words, but I'm not sure I've done a good job carrying it out. I've had my students engage in lots of discussions, but if students aren't apt to speak out or if their brains aren't motivated by this technique, I've skipped over them. Now I have more ideas to make them interact and work on difficult questions. oh boy

Today I pack up for Texas. oh boy oh boy

geography

My room has become a World of Geography.

I told the kids a few weeks ago that I would require them to learn the 50 states before they could graduate... So we spent an unplanned hour this morning labeling a blank map, talking about tricks for remembering them, and figuring out where we had all been. Between me and my afternoon class we had been to every single state.

Their needing to study the states prompted me to bring in my world puzzle that David gave me for my birthday last summer. We were walking downtown, heading for Pike's market with we stopped in a bookshop and Jodie and I got hooked on the puzzle. When I drove back through Seattle on my birthday, David had bought it for me.

I was reluctant at first to put it in my classroom, because I really like it and don't want any pieces to get missing. But, I think it was a good decision. I set it up with the ocean all in tact, so they are just doing continents. And they know I want them to be very careful. This afternoon during carpool there was a swarm of kids around the puzzle, and they pulled down the wall map to find where Pakistan is. Hurray!

On top of this I just had a HUGE road map of Europe laminated so I can draw in with earase-marker the Axis country, and later the Iron Curtain. Add to the collection our huge US map, and we are all geography.

This morning one student had 49 states labeled minus Wyoming. I stabbed my heart and said, "You've missed my favorite state!" And immediately she knew what it was. :)

Fraulein Kate

This is my favorite day of teaching all year. Hands down.

The students turned in our best project. They did some preliminary research on the basics of the first world war warfare. Then they had to hide their research in a disguise. (They were German spies and they had to turn it in to me, their platoon leader.) Their disguises were so creative. Several of them hid it in baked goods...brownies, a cake, cupcakes. A few hid the reserach in mechanical pencils. One student cut open a bunch of tea bags and put little messages in each one and then stapled them again. One student made a lunch pail with a trap bottom. It was like I was getting presents all day long. I got a chocolate bar. There was a 'deck of cards' and even a pack of cigarettes. They were so creative!


On top of this I'm teaching a unit World War I which is probably my favorite thing to teach. And we're reading All Quiet and, on the 4th reading, I don't feel that it's as bad as I remember it being. (Not that I ever thought it's a bad book; I agree it's an excellent book, but I just don't like reading it because it's so difficult, so depressing. But it is good, and we've been having good discussions.)

And, we are studying the Impressionists for the next few days which is fun, and we're about to start my second favorite project which I will definitely describe in a future post.


Also, if you haven't listened to the Weepies song (in the side bar) then you Gotta. It's addictive.

school

We had an awesome discussion in my afternoon class today about capitalism. I taught them the idea of capitalism, and demonstrated how ideally it should work. Then they figured out that while it sounds nice, it doesn’t ensure a good life for the workers or for small businesses. It was so exciting to relate it to current events, such as Wal-Mart putting small stores out of business. So much of the economic ideas we have today all came about in the Industrial Revolution. Guarantees, installment payments, interchangeable parts are all so common to us, but just 150-200 years ago, they were new concepts.

So then when I asked how things should be – what do they think about capitalism and government intervention, one student said that she thought things were bad back then, but the way things are now is good. So then I talked about how many things we buy in America are made in factories in other countries where the standard of living is much lower and the government doesn’t have so many restrictions: so they can hire children, pay less, work them harder. And we discussed how complex the situation is, because it’s hard to know what we can do in our position, or how the problem should be fixed even if we had the power. But it was cool to see them worked up about it and caring about it, and yet also see the complexities of the situation. It was a stimulating discussion.

may day

Though teaching can feel like the toughest job, and when its tough to get up on a Monday morning, I know I have the best job when May flowers are sitting on my desk in a little glass jar from the best parent ever.

There are only 4 more weeks to go here. But I'll miss these kids.

on teaching

Despite the fact that it is Sunday night, with the week of spring break looming up before me, I am thinking about teaching. But this is good, because I am thinking about how much I love it. And I am so excited about having this break from the regular day in the classroom, because time away is revitalizing me, and reminding me of how much I love what I do.

Last week was a good week. Two main reasons:

One, I gave a math test. I planned to give it on Tuesday, but I moved it back to Wednesday, and I decided I always should have 2 days for review because they did SO well! The test was on percent of change--discount, sales tax, interest...hard stuff! And I gave 11 A+ grades (total: 26). It was so thrilling, but mostly because of two grades. One student struggles in math and usually does poorly and has pretty low confidence in math. Her mother worked with her, and she studied a lot, and we reviewed together in the morning before school started. She got a 98!! I was so excited for her. That means she only got 1/2 off a question for a computation error. She got ALL the concepts. And another student who has great struggles in math and who sees a tutor several times a week took the test after reviewing for 3 days, and she got a ONE-HUNDRED. I wish you all could have seen her face when I told her that. Her jaw dropped to the ground and I think I had to pick it up. But I was smiling so big I didn't mind. And when I got to tell Noel her tutor, it was so wonderful being thrilled about it together.

I think this was my first real big feeling of excitement about teaching math and helping sixth graders. And the irony is that when I was in sixth and seventh grade I did NOT understand percent of change and I disTinctly remember hating it and failing that test and feeling like I was just a bad math student. And I really don't feel I taught it that well because it's just plain hard to understand. You have to have clear reading comprehension to see what the problem is saying and asking and then you have to do careful computation, usually involving decimals.

Two, we published a newspaper in the eighth grade. This was a wonderful feeling. First of all, I'd like to thank Ken, for coming to talk to our eighth graders about writing articles. I'd also like to thank Ruth and Radu for being generous hosts so that we could have such a good trip. I'd also like to thank Robyn for asking Ken to come in. And thanks to Phil who stayed an extra hour at work turning pages upside down and inside out so that it would print properly. You'll all be receiving your complementary copy shortly.

Actually, I should really thank Evay(husband of Obergina), because Obergina (3rd grade teacher) told me he was berating her, "Did you see the paper? You didn't get one? We've got to get one." like it was the daily news and they better not leave for spring break without it. He doesn't even know most of the eighth graders. A few minutes later he enthusiastically came down with his 75cents to get a copy. That felt awesome.

Seriously though, I want to tell how the germ of an idea got off the ground (for posterity's sake). This year I feel like I planned and was prepared for the Washington trip so much better than last year. I knew that I wanted to have the kids research before hand and that we should spend time after the trip digesting it. (Added to this desire, I also was actually on schedule in the curriculum, so we had time for this.) I came up with the idea of having the class put out a newspaper because it is always good when kids can get their writing in print, plus having them learn to write an article seemed a good thing. So, after DC we spent the two remaining days of the week talking about our paper: Ken gave a talk about how to write an article, we talked about what papers have, and what ours could have, and what articles should be included.
(And this was a Very lively entertaining discussion. Our paper nearly got called: In*own Out of Town and Monumental News. And we brainstormed a "Sports" section including the lively game of Four of a Couch at the Zuba's, keeping balance on the metro, frisbee on the Mall...)

I assigned them each an article and first they brainstormed what they remembered from the trip, and had each other help them remember things. Then they wrote and revised and edited (and quoted each other extensively). I used microsoft publisher to compile our paper: Capital News. That took about Forever. I don't think it would have gotten done before SB (spring break) if it wasn't for the 6th grade trip which gave me three days with extra planning time. Anyway, we included pictures, and we printed it out in color on the church copier (which is why we have to charge for it). and it is Bea-U-t-i-ful. They persuaded me to write the lead article. But their stuff is funnier. I can get you a copy if you want.

Most posts to follow. All this time to think gives me a lot to say to my blog. and I'm reading and learning such interesting stuff that I want to share.

best parent meeting ever

mom came in with Starbucks iced mocha for me.

the sweetest thing

oo, It's been so long since I've blogged. I'm a bad bad blogger, and it's late late on a school night, but then I seem to be most prolific in the dark hours of the night, so here I go.
I have a good story.

On Friday at school, I got thrown a birthday party! Quite surprising and quite delightful. We were up in the library/computer lab researching, and when we came back down there were balloons and flowers on Sara's desk. It isn't her birthday, and we didn't know what to make of it. Sara happens to be the last one in the room, and so Matt convinces everyone to start singing "Happy Birthday" as soon as she enters the room. She joins in, but then has a confused look on her face when we all say, 'dear, Sara...' and the mystery remains. Until one kid pips up, "I think this is for you, Miss M." So of course I am duly confused until someone points out that it is January 20th, and so today is my half-birthday. And they threw me a surprise party. Because they wanted to celebrate my birthday. (Nevermind about why the kids were confused. I don't know. I should say 'their parents' threw me the party then. They are good parents to me.)

That afternoon during our last hour they brought in a cake, and I think maybe we sang again. And I was very touched, because it is the first-ever birthday I've celebrated in school, and the first time I've ever been surprised for a birthday celebration.

I do believe it redeemed the week.
so begins another one.

hope you have a good one.
and, listen, thanks for commenting, people.
You inspire me to write again.

a severe week

It was a long day at work today, and when I got into my car late in the evening, I was greeted by Billy Joel, blasting from the speakers. I was reminded that life exists outside of work. Strange how I could seem to forget that for 12 hours. "We choose between reality and madness..."
It's been a long week, and especially two very long days since students returned. And I say, shoot, my reality has been madness lately.

Yesterday, on students' first day back, we had a parent meeting in the evening. One parent asked me, "So, did you find the kids had trouble staying awake today as they transitioned back to regular schedules?" I literally had to think long and hard to draw my mind back to the beginning of the day, and I'm sure I had a confused look on my face as I asked, "Was today the first day back? I...don't remember this morning." It seriously felt like five days. But then I did remember a bit of what we did that I shared with them.

As we transition between 2 novels, we're studying the poems of Emily Dickinson. One of my favorite poems ever is "There's a Certain Slant of Light" and ever since I read that, I felt like I could relate to what she was talking about, and I have always seen winter afternoons with different eyes. What I didn't account for, in teaching my students here in Atlanta, is that the effect is not as drastic down here as it is in New England. Perhaps it oppresses even more in Alaska. I shall see... I guess that here there is just less of a tilt to the sun's path, and less of a change in the way the light hits the atmosphere, making it white and bright. So there I was, bearing my heart out, on how I felt that 'heavenly hurt' it gives, and they were looking at me with odd expressions, saying they don't know what she means: summer sun is far more oppressive. I challenged them to write a poem in response. "To You: Emily Dickinson" [ha ha, I laugh because I think Courtney and Mother will get my references.] Or perhaps they will understand the next time they go outside and see with new Emily Dickinson eyes.

Today was such a long day because report cards are due tomorrow. Ideally I would have finished them on Monday, our work day, but unfortunately that was just not as productive a day as I would have liked. There was planning for the week to do, and other little petty things that always take up more time than they should like planning/curriculum work, writing emails to parents, arranging parent-teacher conferences etc. I won't bore you all with the details. I was just talking to fellow teachers about how it's hard to explain our job. People have a feeling for what teachers do, having been students for 12+ years, but it's hard to explain to them what takes up my time post 3:30. Maybe someday I'll get inspired to do it and post it, but I fear it would be a most dreadful boring list.


So that is my week in a nutshell. And since I worked so late today, I didn't take a paperclip home today, and so I am getting to blog to my heart's content. I'm now going to get into pjs, and with some delicious ovaltine, read A Severe Mercy. I cannot recommend this book enough. It is so good. I picked it at a gift exchange with fellow teachers. It was a white elephant for books. I was really tempted to pick up Good Poems, a collection by Garrison Keillor, or Peace Like a River which received wonderful recommendations. But instead I decided to buy those for Mother and Ruth for Christmas, and take A Severe Mercy for myself. Summer, a teacher at my school, said it was excellent. I will tell you just a little bit about it, and while I know that I rarely actually read what someone recommends to me unless they put the book in my hands, I still say read it!

It is a true story written by a man about him and his life. It is a salvation story of their love. He tells the story of their love together - how it grows and is preserved, and is led to real Love. It is written so well that I hang on each word, full of vivid imagery. Part of the book, the part I am reading now, includes letters written to and from C.S. Lewis which, of course, are so well written and hold great insight.

I'm quite thrilled to have comments on my blog. Would that have to do with me actually posting things? =)

Does anyone know how to indent on CSS? I'm looking for a tab-sort of thing. I found 'blockquote' which achieves the above effect, but I'm looking for something that will indent without separating itself from the paragraph above and below as that does with those lines.